Trying.

If only I wasn't
so hurt by this.
If only I could find some healing
in trying
and writing.

If only I wasn't
so floored by this.
If only I could lift myself up
by trying,
and praying.

If only I wasn't
so scuppered by this.
If only I could ignore the lies
by trying,
and singing.

If only I wasn't
so frustrated by this.
If only I could start again
by trying,
and painting.

If only I wasn't
so hammered by this.
If only I could pick myself up
by trying
and baking.

If only I wasn't
so threatened by this.
If only I could fight back
by trying
and screaming.

If only I wasn't
so alone in this.
If only I could make friends
by trying
and talking.

If only I wasn't
so depressed by this.
If only I could cheer myself up
by trying
and drinking.

If only I wasn't
so trying.

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